TO THE SPOILED UNDER-30 CROWD!!!
Posted: Mon Jan 05, 2009 6:27 pm
When I was a kid, adults used to bore me to tears with their tedious diatribes about how hard things were. When they were growing up; what with walking twenty-five miles in hip-deep snow to school every morning ... with all their books?and holes in their shoes? uphill.....BOTH ways!
Yadda, yadda, yadda????????
And I remember promising myself that when I grew up, There was no way in hell I was going to lay a bunch of crap like that on kids about how hard I had it and how easy they've got it!
But now that I'm over the ripe old age of thirty, by umm, a few years?I can't help but look around and notice the youth of today.
You've got it so easy! I mean, compared to my childhood, you live in a damn Utopia!
And I hate to say it but you kids today don't know how good you've got it!
I mean, when I was a kid we didn't have the Internet. If we wanted to know something, We had to go to the damn library and look it up ourselves, in the card catalogue!! Using the Dewey Decimal System! Do you know ?bout that? Huh? HUH?!
There was no email!! We had to actually write somebody a letter, with a pen, put it in an envelope, then you had to walk all the way to wherever the mailbox was and it would take like a week to get there! Do you know how long it took before I got my seahorses?!?!
There were no MP3's, Napsters, or iPods! If you wanted to steal music, you had to go to the damn record store and shoplift it yourself! Do you know how suspicious a 33 1/3 album looks under your t-shirt?
Or - you had to wait around all day to tape it off the radio and the DJ'd usually talk over the beginning and @#*% it all up! Or you?d run out of tape in the middle of the song!
We didn't have fancy crap like Call Waiting! If you were on the phone and somebody else called they got a busy signal, that's it! If you had a wind bag in your family you could pretty much count on never hearing from the outside world.
And we didn't have fancy Caller ID either! When the phone rang, uh, guess what? You had to answer it to see who it was! It could be your school, your mom, your wife, your husband, your boss, your bookie, your drug dealer, a collections agent, you just didn't know!!! You had to pick it up and take your chances, mister! Of course, those were the good ol? days if you liked to dial a number and then just breathe when someone said hello???
We didn't have any fancy Sony Playstation video games with high-resolution 3-D graphics either! We had Etch-A-Sketch! Later we had the Atari 2600. We had games like 'Space Invaders', 'Asteroids', ?Pac Man?, and ?Tetris?. You actually had to use your Imagination!! And there were no multiple levels or screens, it was just one screen???? forever! And you could never win. The game just kept getting harder and harder and faster and faster until you died! Just like LIFE!
Sure, we had cable television (after years of having only 7 channels and something called UHF if you wanted to get a Spanish station), but back then that was only m-net and there was no on-screen menu and no remote control!
You actually had to use a little book called a TV Guide to find out what was on or just be surprised! You were screwed when it came to channel surfing! You had to get off your @$$ and walk over to the TV to change the channel. There was no Cartoon Network either! You could only get cartoons on Saturday morning. Do you hear what I'm saying!?! We had to wait ALL WEEK for cartoons, you spoiled little rat-bastards!
And oh nooo, we didn't have microwaves. If we wanted to heat something up we had to use the stove or eat it cold... imagine that!
If we wanted popcorn, we had to use that stupid Jiffy Pop thing and shake it over the stove forever like an idiot, OR fill an iron skillet with oil, pour in kernels, and then shake the thing ?til all was popped or the oil popped you!
That's exactly what I'm talking about! You kids today have got it too easy.
You're spoiled. You guys wouldn't have lasted five minutes way back in 1980!
Regards,
The over 30 Crowd
Yadda, yadda, yadda????????
And I remember promising myself that when I grew up, There was no way in hell I was going to lay a bunch of crap like that on kids about how hard I had it and how easy they've got it!
But now that I'm over the ripe old age of thirty, by umm, a few years?I can't help but look around and notice the youth of today.
You've got it so easy! I mean, compared to my childhood, you live in a damn Utopia!
And I hate to say it but you kids today don't know how good you've got it!
I mean, when I was a kid we didn't have the Internet. If we wanted to know something, We had to go to the damn library and look it up ourselves, in the card catalogue!! Using the Dewey Decimal System! Do you know ?bout that? Huh? HUH?!
There was no email!! We had to actually write somebody a letter, with a pen, put it in an envelope, then you had to walk all the way to wherever the mailbox was and it would take like a week to get there! Do you know how long it took before I got my seahorses?!?!
There were no MP3's, Napsters, or iPods! If you wanted to steal music, you had to go to the damn record store and shoplift it yourself! Do you know how suspicious a 33 1/3 album looks under your t-shirt?
Or - you had to wait around all day to tape it off the radio and the DJ'd usually talk over the beginning and @#*% it all up! Or you?d run out of tape in the middle of the song!
We didn't have fancy crap like Call Waiting! If you were on the phone and somebody else called they got a busy signal, that's it! If you had a wind bag in your family you could pretty much count on never hearing from the outside world.
And we didn't have fancy Caller ID either! When the phone rang, uh, guess what? You had to answer it to see who it was! It could be your school, your mom, your wife, your husband, your boss, your bookie, your drug dealer, a collections agent, you just didn't know!!! You had to pick it up and take your chances, mister! Of course, those were the good ol? days if you liked to dial a number and then just breathe when someone said hello???
We didn't have any fancy Sony Playstation video games with high-resolution 3-D graphics either! We had Etch-A-Sketch! Later we had the Atari 2600. We had games like 'Space Invaders', 'Asteroids', ?Pac Man?, and ?Tetris?. You actually had to use your Imagination!! And there were no multiple levels or screens, it was just one screen???? forever! And you could never win. The game just kept getting harder and harder and faster and faster until you died! Just like LIFE!
Sure, we had cable television (after years of having only 7 channels and something called UHF if you wanted to get a Spanish station), but back then that was only m-net and there was no on-screen menu and no remote control!
You actually had to use a little book called a TV Guide to find out what was on or just be surprised! You were screwed when it came to channel surfing! You had to get off your @$$ and walk over to the TV to change the channel. There was no Cartoon Network either! You could only get cartoons on Saturday morning. Do you hear what I'm saying!?! We had to wait ALL WEEK for cartoons, you spoiled little rat-bastards!
And oh nooo, we didn't have microwaves. If we wanted to heat something up we had to use the stove or eat it cold... imagine that!
If we wanted popcorn, we had to use that stupid Jiffy Pop thing and shake it over the stove forever like an idiot, OR fill an iron skillet with oil, pour in kernels, and then shake the thing ?til all was popped or the oil popped you!
That's exactly what I'm talking about! You kids today have got it too easy.
You're spoiled. You guys wouldn't have lasted five minutes way back in 1980!
Regards,
The over 30 Crowd